Sybil Bruncheon's "Holiday Reminder!... A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT FROM P.E.T.A…

… is YOUR pet safe from the dangers of OVER-celebrating?"...

The heartbreak of alcohol abuse in the modern pet household... Does your pet drink privately when you're at work??... Have you ever seen your pet casually brush things off kitchen counters while staring at you... or pretend to read the newspaper, and then eat it?... Does he or she hide stashes of catnip or old smelly socks under sofas, in cardboard boxes, or buried in houseplants?... Does your four-legged friend cry inconsolably during broadcasts of the Westminster Kennel Club show... or old Nine Lives commercials??... Does your pet secretly entertain OTHER pets in your home when you're away on vacation, possibly while wearing a coconut brassiere and a grass skirt?... Have you found livestock-nudey magazines, kitten calendars, cassette tapes involving barnyard sounds, or OTHER pets' collars in YOUR underwear drawer???... Has your pet begun to wear make-up, very subtle at first, but gradually tending towards evening make-up for just a simple walk around the block in the morning?.. and finally lipstick way outside its lip line? These are all warning signs of the lonely downward spiral of pet-substance-abuse... don't let shame or "magical thinking" keep YOU from helping your loved one!!!! Act now!!!!!! Dial P-U-S-S-Y D-R-U-N-K today! That's right! Dial 787-793-7865....There's no time to waste!!!...

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