Sybil Bruncheon’s “Lame Comments On My Facebook Pages”... #1…

So I post stories attached to funny, odd, and startling photos, but I continue to get the most incongruous, unrelated, and tangential comments left on them... People don't actually read my writing, they just look and post the first thing that comes to mind, often with no evidence that they have an organ that would function as a "mind". Periodically, I dump idlers, dunces, and simpletons from my FB "friends" list for these annoying and boring infractions... or I refer them (permanently!) to my "Pictures Only" pages where they can stare, point, and even color on the computer screen with their Crayola 6-Color set... and drool... or… whatever. Here is a photo which I constructed a whole story for, and here are some of the comments that were left by FB folks... Judge for yourself. (Profuse apologies if I posted YOUR comment here for public scrutiny!).

1) I like to take a nice walk around my neighborhood before I go to bed.. and walk my parakeet, Jerome. I used to have another parakeet named Winky.

2) I'm the head of my block association "Litter Committee", and I got a special mention in the Little Rock Cockle-Doodle Doo Morning Gazette about it... with a photo! But it made me look fat. Don't you hate when that happens?

3) You reminded me that our driveway is cracked, and I have to call Abner Feeney about it on Monday. Thanks.

4) Why don't men wear hats anymore? It would cover their bald spots, especially during dinner... or when they're asleep.

5) I ate at a roadside diner last week and got food poisoning. I guess I shouldn't order Boeuf Bourguignon at a gas station named Mr. Nancy's Gas ‘n’ Go.

6) Homeless people shouldn't panhandle on the street and expect working folks to drop change into their hats... no matter how good they can sing... or play the harmonika. My Uncle Ned could play the harmonika really good, but he didn't expect to be paid for it. At least, not on a sidewalk.

7) I get lost really easy... even when there are street signs. And arrows. That's why I flunked out of Cub Scouts.

8) That place looks closed. Why is everyone hanging around... or is it about to open for breakfast. I don't like my eggs runny. Do you?

9) I hate when the flash bulb makes my eyes glow like Satan. But I DO like Halloween! Do you?

10) Brown shoes with a brown suit. Never black... not even as a strappy-sandal. I have thirteen pairs of sandals. Do you?

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