SybilSez...

Sybil Bruncheon has been performing on stage, radio, TV, film, and in various Vaudeville, burlesque, church basement, county fair, and sideshow....uh..."venues" for most of her 29 years. She is available for bookings for just about anything and can be reached at bruncheon@hotmail.com and on her website sybilbruncheon.com. She is a proud member of the Actors Equity Association and the Screen Actors Guild. Her erdo number is 16.

Becky Shrubmeyer and Helen Thikfistle prided themselves on being modern women who could take their house allowances from their husbands and not only keep their homes running but also put aside some "pin money" to play the stock market. During the day, when their housekeeping chores were done, the laundry was in their washers and dryers, and dinners were already on the stove, Becky and Helen would sit over afternoon coffee and chocolate chip cookies and clip coupons for the grocery store and check out the financial pages of the Times and the Wall Street Journal... and boy did they hit it big! So big, in fact, that they finally opened separate (and secret!) savings accounts away from their husbands' prying eyes.

Their accounts grew and grew as they bought and sold, bought and sold; stocks for mining copper in Idaho and gold in Nigeria, corn futures in Iowa and wheat in Argentina, pork bellies in Kansas and beef from Brazil... The world truly was, as the saying goes, "their oyster"! The money poured in, and their private savings accounts climbed into the six figures. Even nice Mr. Throckmorton at the brokerage would greet them by their first names and scurry over with his secretary, Miss Pynch with coffee and donuts when they might wander into the office once a month to confer about their investments. All the other brokers and their support staffs would point and whisper about "those two gals from Grandy Corners" in the mostly male world of profits and portfolios of 1957.

It all seemed ideal, didn't it? The sleek and chic 1950s unfolding in post-war abundance... until that bump in the road called the Eisenhower Recession... when all the laughter and martinis turned into screeching and tears. Yep, "the gals" had made a careless choice to invest all their money in lipstick and mascara futures in some place called Iraq. In a single weekend, their accounts were gone... all gone. And it was back to the ironing boards and jello molds with carrot shavings, Spam chunks, and mini-marshmallows... with Phil and Carl none the wiser… oh well...

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... shortly after the HUAC hearings began and Hollywood was rocked by the hysteria and scandal of possible Communists in every cartoon and cooking show on tv and radio, my Ladies Gardening Club was rounded up for questioning. It's true that our color scheme for the Spring had been titled "THINK PINK!", and that Gale Sondergaard had been a guest speaker at our "Perennially a Star!" luncheon, but the FBI never found any typewriters, or even a pencil in our flower beds.... and the closest our flowers came to being left-leaning was when we planted them on the shadier side of the house!!... here are the girls just minutes before the cops kicked in the French doors to our "Gal Gazebo" and led us all away with our Singapore Slings still in our hands!!! They let us keep the drinks… but they took away our little paper umbrellas. They claimed we might try to “injure” ourselves in our cell!!

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