SybilSez...

Sybil Bruncheon has been performing on stage, radio, TV, film, and in various Vaudeville, burlesque, church basement, county fair, and sideshow....uh..."venues" for most of her 29 years. She is available for bookings for just about anything and can be reached at bruncheon@hotmail.com and on her website sybilbruncheon.com. She is a proud member of the Actors Equity Association and the Screen Actors Guild. Her erdo number is 16.

Yes, folks, many people today think they are adequately gay, but let's be honest, in these days of self-indulgent, entitled, babbling millennials who know nearly nothing about their heritage or culture, can anyone really be GAY ENOUGH? In an attempt to correct some of this cultural bankruptcy and general ignorance, we have created a quiz which allows YOU to know exactly!... ARE YOU GAY ENOUGH?

Take a close look at these photos; it's not enough to know they are scenes from THE WOMEN (1939) with its star-studded cast. Your gay credentials will be "in order" if you can correctly match the right scenario to the correct photo.

a) Having had no luck with men, Mary decides to introduce her daughter to a lesbian lifestyle by raiding daddy’s closet, his imported tobacco cabinet, and his collection of French post cards. She also decides that her daughter’s “little mustache problem” might be kind of attractive after all…

b) Mary’s mother has offered to crochet her a perfectly lovely gown for the junior prom… sadly, it’s very time consuming, and Mary is now 47 years old…

c) The famous “Night of The Undead Socialites” scene in which wealthy and bored housewives are lured away from bridge luncheons and flower arranging classes to a hideous existence as zombies… though very physically fit ones.

d) The Countess acknowledges that yes, they HAVE just hit an iceberg, “but there’s always time for just one more little drinky-winky!”…

e) While trying on expensive gowns, Mary and Sylvia show the sales lady “that M&Ms melt in your mouth! Not in your hands!”…

f) The photo is of Olga the manicurist trying to warn Sylvia that the new hair dryers don’t run on electricity! They run on gas! HIGHLY FLAMMABLE GAS! Sylvia doesn’t remember what happened when she had her hair done on the Hindenburg…

(Correct answers can be found on page 317 in the new issue of Humpty Dumpty Magazine, right after the Find The Oblong Vegetables In The Tree puzzle.)

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