Sybil Bruncheon's HIT-OR-MISS Histories... Fascinating Inventions:

... Ah, yes... the famous Seatless Hysterium... invented by Hyrus Schnectum. A student of Sigmund Freud, he became obsessed with the idea of the "unsatisfied" female psychiatric patient and that "hysteria" was a completely curable condition if a woman was properly... "attended to". Indeed, the word hysteria originates from the Greek word for uterus, "hystera". The oldest record of hysteria dates back to 1900 B.C. when Egyptians recorded behavioral abnormalities in adult women on medical papyrus. The Egyptians attributed the behavioral disturbances to a "wandering uterus"—thus later dubbing the condition "hysteria". In the late 19th and early 20th centuries, a variety of electrical devices were patented as both medical and home remedies for female disorders which a woman could use "in the privacy of her toilette"... but it was Schnectum who came up with this dual purpose excercise/sexercize "Seatless Hysterium". Suffice it to say, there was no seat, ok?... I guess we can let the smile on Mrs. Gladys Hobkins tell us everything we need to know. Schnectum's slogan for the Seatless Hysterium?... "Pedal! Pedal! Pedal your way to PLACID!!"...

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...from Sybil Bruncheon's "EASTER EGGS-traordinaries"... EASTER / The morning-after!... Doctor! OH, DOCTOR!

Easter Bunny Freud (628F).jpg

"Oof curse, you air feelink dejaicted! Whoo cahn blame you? You pro-wide dee treats, und de kahndees, und de mairsh-mahlow-how-do-you-say-PEEEPS, und de plahsteek grahss, und de hideous aigs, und de stoopid bahskette, und de choc-laht tings, und de cahndy canes... whatever!... und de cheeldren screeeeming and crying weesh to pet you und den throw you aside for a duck...or a chicken... or dare Mommy?!?!... You air a mahs of neurosees and ahpreehansions! BUT! Vee vill get to dee bottom of all ob eet... beginning with your own Musser and habbing to share herr weeth 816 siblings....!!!"

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