Sybil Bruncheon's A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS: My Vanilla Orchid…
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… many of you know that, although I adore animals, I’m not able at this time to have any animal companions because of my rental situation. I am however by nature a nurturer; it gives my life meaning to be the caretaker and the taker-care-of antiques, strange memorabilia, eccentric historical objects, flea-market-finds, and plants, both out in the garden and inside as domesticated roommates. Case in point; my Vanilla Orchid (Vanilla planifolia)…
… Yes, it’s true. The beautiful vanilla extract that we all love (and is central to so many more foods than just vanilla ice cream) comes from an orchid, specifically from its long, very narrow and shriveled seed pods. It’s only been in the last few years, mostly through cooking shows on TV, that the public has even heard of vanilla coming from a split-opened and scraped seed pod or that the microscopic black seeds are the source of the actual taste. Imagine the big dessert companies of the 1950s ever allowing millions of black specks floating in their vanilla ice cream and marketing it as gourmet and a luxury item! But now, evidence of vanilla seeds is de rigeur in everything from crème brûlée, soufflés, and mousses to vanilla French toast. Only an oaf would now look at a sundae of Häagen-Dazs vanilla ice cream and ask, “what’s this dirt on my scoop?”…
Back to my kitchen; here is a wonderful though temperamental Vanilla Orchid. It is both “terrestrial” (getting nutrients from soil) and “epiphytic” (living in a tree with its own air-roots). In the wild, they love warm, very humid air and can grow to be over 100’ long in a high tree canopy. They love indirect, filtered light, but avoid direct sunlight like most orchids. Although “epiphytic” orchids live on the bark of trees, they are not parasites. They don’t injure or weaken the trees they climb. Their air roots absorb nutrients from rainfall and fresh air reacting with the bark that they attach themselves to. When you buy an orchid from a nursery or floral service, that orchid growing in some mass-produced ceramic pot actually thinks it’s growing vertically up the side of a tree, not horizontally in some office cubicle or on Grandma’s dining room table. It’s one reason why over 96% of the orchids that are raised and sold die within a month or so… they are starved, drowned, neglected, abused, or tossed in the garbage when their blooms fade and drop. In fact, the average orchid (usually a Phalaenopsis or “moth orchid” will bloom for as much as 4 months before it drops its blossoms!... and then, if loved, take a short break before blooming again!)
Again, back to my kitchen… I was scared to try a Vanilla Orchid because of their diva-esque reputation, and my natural fear of killing or injuring the innocent and trusting! But a couple of my garden-center pals (Leslie and Kelsey specifically) convinced me that I’d be a good foster-parent, so I took the plunge. I don’t have humidifiers or a greenhouse, but I did, within only a week, have new shoots coming out of the main stems and beginning to leaf and, dare I say, bud? No, I don’t have a 8’ pole for it to climb, but this orchid which is about 6 years old has been “trained”. When any shoots grow too long for the wooden stake provided, the dangling shoot is allowed to just keep drooping over until it can be “woven” back into the existing growth. You can see that this has been done again and again. Left to its own devices in the wild, Vanilla Orchids grow a single woody stalk with long, spear-like leaves scattered along its length!
And, have you noticed? Yes, the Vanilla Orchid IS the inspiration for the original “Jack and the Beanstalk”! Look closely! Isn’t it exactly what we’ve always been shown as the winding stalk that every Jack has climbed from fairy-tale illustrations to movies, cartoons, and television!? All I do is spritz the wooden stake on all sides, top-to-bottom with distilled H2O in the morning… and then some extra spritzes on the inside of the outer pot betwn it and the inside pot. That keeps the humidity acceptably high without drowning the roots in the soil. Although it’s in a Southern window, the sunlight is speckled or filtered and never too intense. Apparently, my little orchid is fairly happy. Its foliage is glossy, almost fake looking green. Its shoots are exuberant, and both Leslie and Kelsey who have sister-plants from the same batch, say that mine is competitively beautiful… and they both are professionals with complete set-ups in their homes! JEEESH!
One last note: unlike a Phalaenopsis orchid whose blooms can last for months, a Vanilla Orchid’s blossoms are neither abundant nor hardy. As opposed to a cloud of flours hovering in the air on several stems, Vanilla Orchids reluctantly offer a few smallish blooms tucked into all that “beanstalk” foliage, and they last for one day! ONE DAY!... and the plant has to be very healthy to even THAT! And during that single day, the blossom will drop off, pollinated or not… it doesn’t matter. Only the most talented and fully equipped domestic gardener can manage to actually produce a vanilla bean or two inside a home, and only after their Vanilla Orchid is about 6 or more years old. And the gardener has to hand-polinate the blooms with a toothpick immediately… again, the blossoms only las a matter of hours on a single day. In the wild, a specific bee is the sole pollinater for the Vanilla Orchid!... talk about neurotic and demanding!! Oh well… I’ve been married to neurotic and demanding beauties before… and it was worth it… so… wish me luck. This little Vanilla Orchid is indeed One Of My Favorite Things!
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