Sybil Bruncheon's "What's The Real Story?"...

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…you pick your favorite to go with the picture:

1) Sister Mary Meow-ergretta looked out on the dazzling world whirling around outside the Konvent of Kontented Kitties and wondered, “What if?... What if I had remained on the street all those years ago, and risked one or two of my nine lives for a weekend of glamour, velvet pillows, heavy petting… and sardines? And perhaps, yes, even a sparkly collar with a tag… or a bell!”…

2) Madame Mousette watched from her perch on the Rue du Maquereau where the guillotine had been set up in the small park across the way. She knew, as did her fellow Revolutionaries, that heads would roll and with their help. They continued to claw the names of the guilty into coffee tables, sofa arms, and in unwinding rolls of toilet paper which they scattered on their atelier floors… for the authorities to find… and act on.

3) Pinky was very aware that his humans had taken away the strange holiday tree with the blinky-lights and wiggly-toys that hung all over it for him to bat at and pull down. He missed being able to jump off the sofa up into the branches looking for a squirrel, a bird, or maybe a piece of cheese or hotdog that might have learned how to fly… whatever. Sometimes, he secretly invited some of his neighborhood kitty-pals in through the little flip-door to jump into the tree, maybe to tip it over and break a vase… or wake up grandpa in his chair and make him screech. Pinky heard that the sparkly-star on top of the tree might even poke out a person’s eye, and that made his pals laugh and laugh. They all thought that would be funny to see. And the little house the humans put under the tree? With the tiny-people and animals?... he and his pals loved knocking them over... or worse… Pinky himself had chewed up a couple of cows, a sheep, a wise-man or two, and then thrown the baby out of the stick-bed and climbed in himself to take a nap. He was only sorry about one thing; the tiny-lady kneeling by the stick-bed… first of all, maybe he shouldn’t have chewed her head off, and then hidden her in the cat litter… and secondly, maybe he shouldn’t be pretending to be her in the front window… even if it DID make his pals out in the front yard laugh and laugh… whatever.

4) (to be continued)

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From Sybil Bruncheon's "MY MERRY MEMOIRS"... The Rudey Awards!...

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February 15th, 1987... thirty-???? (long!) years ago at the fabulous Palladium on East 14th Street in glittering Manhattan! Yes! The great Palladium built back in 1927 and host to major stars, big band acts, Vaudeville, and major movies and rock concerts... Steve Rubell and Ian Schrager bought the entire structure, reimagined and renovated much of it, and kept the most atmospheric wreck and ruin inside and celebrated it... almost as if Stephen Sondheim’s FOLLIES had come true!

It was glamorous, naughty, edgy, sexy, and magical... And I was lucky enough to be hired by the great club promoters at the time to create and emcee major events including Holiday shows. And this invitation was for a satire I created on Awards Ceremonies called the Rudey Awards... I had invented it all, and the trophies were "silver-plated" WWI hand grenades mounted on plexi-glass star-shaped stands. The Rudey Awards were for outstanding breaches of etiquette and good taste... and, being an Aquarius (known for their foresight and prescience!!) I had already selected Rudolph Giuliani, Leona Helmsley, and yes, Donald Trump among others for particular awards in specific categories. Of course, none of them showed up, but their awards were "accepted" by various performers who came up and made hysterical speeches interspersed with musical productions by guest stars and raffle drawings for tremendous prizes! How interesting that Mummie has been nailing these Page 6 thugs and skanks far longer than MSNBC and the major networks... but, like poor Cassandra in the Fall of Troy, I have never been believed or even respected... Oh well... maybe a girl can't have big muscles and a brain too… right?

(photos by Francesco Scavullo)

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Sybil Bruncheon's KOOKY KAPTIONS!...

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"Now you both understand! You're only understudies for Ginger and the Professor in our Christmas pageant. If they get over their food poisoning, you'll both go back to being the innkeeper and his wife!... and don't go near Lovey's coconut cream pie!"...

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Sybil Bruncheon's KOOKY KAPTIONS!...

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"Oh, Demetrius! Do you really think Woolite will be gentle enough? It's my favorite Blankie!"...

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Sybil Bruncheon's "WHO'Z DAT?"... Hollywood Birthdays in JANUARY... BEHIND THE SCENES!

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(clockwise from top center: Leslie Bricusse 1/29,  Cecil Beaton 1/14, Ernst Lubitsch 1/29 & Adolph Zukor 1/7, Artur Rubenstein 1/28, Jerome Kern 1/27, Federico Fellini 1/20, Carl Laemmle 1/17, Jimmy Van Heusen 1/26, Henry King 1/24, Mack Sennett 1/17, D.W. Griffith 1/22, and Hal Roach 1/14.)

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Sybil Bruncheon's "WHO'Z DAT?"... Birthdays in JANUARY... The LEADING LADIES!

(clockwise from top center: Suzanne Pleshette & Tippi Hedren, Luise Rainer, Jean Simmons, Patricia Neal, Loretta Young, Tallulah Bankhead, Katharine Ross, Joan Leslie, Vanessa Redgrave, Faye Dunaway, and Moira Shearer.)[Want to read other fun an…

(clockwise from top center: Suzanne Pleshette 1/31 & Tippi Hedren 1/19, Luise Rainer 1/12, Jean Simmons 1/31, Patricia Neal 1/20, Loretta Young 1/6, Tallulah Bankhead 1/31, Katharine Ross 1/29, Joan Leslie 1/26, Vanessa Redgrave 1/30, Faye Dunaway 1/14, and Moira Shearer 1/17.)

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Sybil BRUNCHEON's "WHO'Z DAT?"... Birthdays in JANUARY... the FUNNY GIRLS!

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(clockwise from top center: Ann Sothern, Josephine Hull, Jean Stapleton, Constance Collier, Butterfly McQueen, Gypsy Rose Lee, Chita Rivera, Ethel Merman, Marion Davies, Carol Channing, Sophie Tucker, and Margaret O’Brien.)

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Sybil Bruncheon's "WHO'Z DAT?"... Hollywood Birthdays in JANUARY... The LEADING MEN!

(clockwise from top center: Ray Milland 1/3, Randolph Scott 1/23 & Cary Grant 1/18, Elvis Presley 1/8, Robert Stack 1/13, Paul Newman 1/26, Rod Taylor 1/11, Dana Andrews 1/1, Paul Henreid 1/10, and Troy Donahue 1/27)

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Sybil Bruncheon's "WHO'Z DAT?"... Hollywood Birthdays in JANUARY!... The CHARACTERS!

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(clockwise from top center: Billy Gray 1/13, Ernest Borgnine 1/24, Conrad Veidt 1/22, Sal Mineo 1/10, James Earl Jones 1/17, Sabu 1/27, José Ferrer 1/8, William Warfield 1/22, Dan Duryea 1/23, Leon Ames 1/20, Ron Moody 1/8, Paul Scofield 1/21, and William Bendix 1/4.)

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