Sybil Bruncheon’s Strange But True Histories: On this day, January 24th, 1972...

… a Japanese soldier, Shoichi Yokoi, was discovered in Guam, having spent 28 years hiding in the jungle thinking World War II was still going on.

On this same date: I knew a very nice older lady, Myrtle Narnelstein, who hid out for three years in the Fine Lingerie & Ladies' Support Garments department at Saks waiting for an incorrectly advertised sale...... she lived undiscovered and quite comfortably in the various Home Furnishings areas. I envied her her secret life hidden away from the insanity of the outside world. And in addition to the quiet once the great store closed up each evening, she threw the best little soirées in different departments for her mannequin friends and the expensive stuffed animals from the children’s toy boutique... mostly Steiff Teddy Bears… and a Gund dromedary and a velveteen rabbit. She ate nothing but delicacies; fine cakes and cookies, caviar and rare preserves, jams, and jellies, imported chocolates, pates, and petit fours, crème de glaces, followed by the best champagnes and dessert wines in the Gourmet-Gifts Shop …

Sadly, her constant and completely unbalanced diet of luxury foods resulted in her putting on over 267 lbs, which of course eventually “blew her cover”. She was finally caught stuck in the store's escalator, and the whole sordid truth was revealed. The store management was furious, not just because she had pulled it all off and escaped the eyes of security personnel… No! She was so large that they had to jack-hammer the West 58th Street walls down to fork-lift her out of the 3rd floor. The Limoges China department and Little Miss Petites Shoppe were completely demolished…

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Sybil Bruncheon’s “Seeing Is Believing… or is it?”...

Which of these is the correct explanation for this photo?

1) On the plant Gzzoolxton, naughty children are sent outdoors for a “time-out” as punishment. Interestingly, the term “time-out” is literal because the child is left outside for one of the interdimensional flying saucers to come by and take them to a parallel universe for several centuries… although they will still be back home in time for dinner… and a spanking.

2) Eugene Carpathy suffered from koinoniphobia: Fear of rooms! Yes, there IS an actual phobia for rooms! Can you believe it?... Oddly, Eugene only “developed” koinoniphobia after his uncle Frank asked him to repaint his four bedroom house… Frank got suspicious too when Eugene struggled with pronouncing “koinoniphobia”. He said “going-onion-phon-onia”.

3) Citizens of Badel-Badel, Hungary have a very compassionate health care system in place. No person is ever denied medical attention no matter what the malady or their financial situation. On the other hand, sometimes the treatment for various illnesses might be very similar. Fear of heights, caffeine withdrawal, willful sullenness, and chronic depression are all lumped under one “cure”… the patient is seated on a steel plate near a copper antenna rigged with yards of wire to wait for the next lightning strike… happily, there is only a nominal copay…

4) In San Souci, France, the Existential Festival on Albert Camus’ birthday was a time of yawning, sighing, staring into space, and the reciting of poetry that didn’t rhyme, usually by oneself or possibly while looking into a mirror if one wanted company. The promoters thought about marketing the weekend “Camus-Con”… but wondered… what’s the point?

5) Filbert’s incessant and deafening yodeling had completely emptied the town… Pastor Helgar dropped by to say goodbye before he left on the bus for Akron.

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Sybil Bruncheon's People and Poetry...

Puckered lips and rasping snarl, Squinty eyes and ready quarrel, Crab-like gestures, orange pout, Greasy handshake, bulbous snout.

Cotton candy ‘stead of hair. Bloated torso but no heart there. Sawed in half you’d find some guts, Jimmy Hoffa, a stack of smuts.

And when he slithers ‘cross the floor, There’s a trail of slime, and maybe gore. He’ll grab your privates; no invite needed. Repeated lawsuits, threats unheeded.

Billions? Millions? Maybe less. Angst and anger, viral stress. He lives for fame and adoration. And bilks his minions, rapes the nation.

“I’ll drain the swamp! I swear! I promise. And appoint fair judges, like Clarence Thomas." Thanks, red-voters, for your behemoth-mess… Who is this monster? Can you guess?

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Sybil Bruncheon’s “I Had A Dream”...

… Breaking News from the CNN News Desk:
Donald Trump has been killed in a fiery car crash involving a Good Humor truck and 400lbs of Creamsicles. He awakens in a strange bedroom with all the doors and windows bricked over and no exits. On the side table is a copy of Jean Paul Sartre's play "Huis Clos". The lines for Joseph Garcin are underlined with a note saying Trump should learn them immediately... or not... whatever. Suddenly, from under the bed, Sarah Huckabee and Kellyanne Conway climb out and reveal that they are to play the roles of Inès Serrano and Estelle Rigault... or not... whatever. The role of the Valet is to be played by Mike Pence... who doesn't show up. There is an increasing smell of sulfur and farts along with extreme heat, and muffled laughter coming from inside the walls... or possibly mooing. The voice of Rod Serling is heard explaining that no, this is not a dream... and it's permanent. Whatever.

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Sybil Bruncheon’s Our Story Book Corner presents "The Funny Old Tool Shed"!

...and it was at that point that Professor Scawld seized the rusty axe by its handle and pulled it loose from old Mrs. Simpkins’ forehead! "HaHaHAAAAA!", he shrieked, "and now I'll have that piece of pound cake WITH the strawberry ice cream I asked so politely for, you damnable hag!". And he shared some of the delicious treat with Pinky, his jolly little hamster!..... Later, much later, poor little Pinky died when his scarf got caught in his running wheel…

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A New Sybil's "WHO'Z DAT?"... HARRY DAVENPORT (January 19, 1866 – August 9, 1949)

Darlings! Mummy has made a decision! After reading dozens of posts and having hundreds of conversations with well-meaning folks who just don't know about the great CHARACTER actors who gave films the depth and genius that surrounded and supported the so-called "stars", I am going to post a regular, special entry called SYBIL'S "WHO'Z DAT??"....there'll be photos and a mini-bio, and the next time you see one of those familiar, fabulous faces that you just "can't quite place"... well, maybe these posts will help. Some of these actors worked more, had longer and broader careers, and ended up happier, more loved, and even wealthier than the "stars" that the public "worships"... I think there may be a metaphor in that! What do you think???... well, if ever, ever there was an actor who was loved, truly loved more than this one, I’ve never heard of him… it’s Harry Davenport (January 19, 1866 – August 9, 1949), everybody’s favorite “grandpa”.

Harold George Bryant Davenport, he was an American film and stage actor who worked in show business from the age of six until his death. Born just one year after the end of the Civil War in Canton, Pennsylvania, where his family lived during the holidays. He also grew up in Philadelphia. Harry came from a long line of stage actors; his father was thespian Edward Loomis Davenport, and his mother, Fanny Vining Davenport, was an English actress and a descendant of the renowned 18th-century Irish stage actor Jack Johnson. His sister was actress Fanny Davenport. In fact all nine of the Davenport children shared their parents’ love for the arts, and several, including Harry, dedicated their lives to performing. Harry himself made his stage debut at the age of five at the Chestnut Theater in Philadelphia in a play written by Richard Edwards, DAMON AND PYTHIAS. Written in a tribute dedicated to Davenport in the “Canton Sunday Telegraph” in 1949 is a notation about the fact that Harry never spent his earnings from that debut.  The story doesn’t refer to his being frugal, but rather endearing and sentimental –  “His pay was $1.95 in coins of every denomination then current and all dated 1871.  A five-dollar gold piece was added as a ‘bonus.'” Davenport kept the old coins in a safe deposit box and often said that a million dollars couldn’t make him get rid of them. And it remained so even during the leanest of times.  

By his teen years Harry Davenport was a veteran stage actor playing Shakespearian stock companies. Working regionally for years, Davenport made his Broadway debut in THE VOYAGE OF SUZETTE (1894) at the age of 28 and appeared there in numerous plays for decades. While still working exclusively on the stage, Davenport also co-founded the Actor’s Equity Association (then called “The White Rats”) with stage legend, Eddie Foy. The union was formed to address theater owners’ exploitation of actors.  Within the first year “The White Rats” had an enthusiastic membership who would cause a close-out of theaters in protest.  It was that difficult situation (for the most part) that prompted Harry to join Vitagraph Studios in NYC at the age of 47, debuting in the 1913 silent short film KENTON'S HEIR, followed the next year by Sidney Drew’s, TOO MANY HUSBANDS, and FOGG'S MILLIONS, and a series of film shorts co-starring another veteran of the stage, Rose Tapley. These included eighteen comedy shorts that made up what is referred to as the “Jarr Family” series.  In it, Davenport played Mr. Jarr, the patriarch of a middle-class family whose misadventures the series revolved around. Aside from playing the head of the Jarr family, Harry was also given directing duties in the stories, which were based on newspaper dailies written by humorist, Roy McCardell starting in 1907. All eighteen of the Jarr family productions at Vitagraph were produced and released in 1915.

In addition, he also directed some silent features and many shorts between 1915 and 1917. Davenport continued to work in film steadily throughout the 1910s, but returned to the stage full-time for the rest of the 1920s after a small, uncredited part in Fred Newmeyer’s, AMONG THOSE PRESENT in 1921. Full-time that is if stage work was available.  Just like many other Americans at the time, Harry and his second wife Phyllis Rankin (a successful actor in her own right) were living through tough financial times.  When not on the stage the couple would make ends meet by teaching acting and theater arts on the side and/or by picking wild strawberries which Phyllis made into preserves. They sold the preserves in New York and were successful enough at it to be able to “hire” local boys to help pick the strawberries. The boys’ pay was the promise of a bicycle to the best picker – a promise that was always kept. 

Harry Davenport made a few films in the early 1930s, but it wasn’t until Phyllis’ untimely death in 1934 that his film career took off after he decided to travel to California to give Hollywood an earnest effort.  Driving cross-country in his jalopy, Harry took his time, stopping in different cities along the way to act in a play or two to earn extra money. Could he ever have imagined that a brand-new career awaited him playing grandfathers, judges, doctors, and ministers. He came to Hollywood at 69 years of age during the height of the Great Depression and became one of the most beloved, admired and prolific actors in film history and one of the best-known and busiest "old men" in Hollywood films during the 1930s and 1940s. 

Settling comfortably in a life in Hollywood, Harry Davenport took on as many movie roles as he could handle. He had a gift for both comedy and drama and specialized in playing earnest, authoritative, wise, and sometimes wise-cracking characters, most often men who others turned to for guidance. He appeared in only one scene for a few minutes as a wise and wryly observant judge in Frank Capra’s YOU CAN’T TAKE IT WITH YOU (1938), but his performance is unforgettable right to the final shot of him smiling and shaking his head at the pandemonium in his courtroom!

Harry Davenport played Dr. Meade in GONE WITH THE WIND (1939), a role that was both comical and poignant and extremely important to the central story as it unfolded. He completely commands the screen opposite Vivien Leigh, Clark Gable, and Olivia de Havilland, During his “twilight” years, when most others would be settling down into retirement, Harry Davenport worked continuously. To put it in perspective, he made thirteen films in what is considered by many to be the greatest year in film, 1939. Thirteen!! Aside from GONE WITH THE WIND, these included John Cromwell’s, MADE FOR EACH OTHER (as Dr. Healy), Irving Cummings’, THE STORY OF ALEXANDER GRAHAM BELL (as Judge Rider), William Dieterle’s, JUAREZ starring Paul Muni and Bette Davis, and Gus Meins’, MONEY TO BURN (as Grandpa). And from a productive standpoint that year was only so-so for Harry. He’d appeared in nineteen films in 1937!! 

Some of his other film roles are as the aged King Louis XI of France in THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME (1939) with film greats Charles Laughton, Thomas Mitchell, Edmond O’Brien, George Zucco, Maureen O'Hara, and Cedric Hardwicke. He played the lone resident in a ghost town in THE BRIDE CAME C.O.D. (1942), filmed on location in Death Valley, He also had supporting roles in Alfred Hitchcock’s thriller FOREIGN CORRESPONDENT (1940), William A. Wellman’s western THE OX-BOW INCIDENT (1943) and in KINGS ROW (1943) with Ronald Reagan. Davenport also played the iconic grandfather of Judy Garland in Vincente Minnelli's classic MEET ME IN ST. LOUIS (1944) and the great-uncle of Myrna Loy and Shirley Temple in THE BACHELOR AND THE BOBBY-SOXER (1947).

A lesser film Harry Davenport appeared in, but one we have to mention is the fifth entry in The Thin Man series, Richard Thorpe’s, THE THIN MAN GOES HOME (1945). Harry Davenport plays Dr. Charles, the father of one of the most popular detectives in filmdom, Nick Charles of Nick and Nora fame. A perfect choice!  This particular story shows Nick and Nora returning to Nick’s parents’ house for vacation.  Nick’s father, Dr. Charles, always dreamed of his son becoming a doctor as well and collaborating with him on a project for a new hospital.  Not familiar with his son’s natural talents for investigation, the Doctor views Nick as little more than a beat cop. Meanwhile, Nick longs for his father’s approval so Nora sets out to involve Nick in a murder mystery in his hometown so the old Doctor can be duly impressed. In the end the Doctor is quite impressed with the son’s skills and when he tells the younger Charles, Nick’s vest buttons bust with pride (literally). The super-talented William Powell and Myrna Loy are joined not only by Harry Davenport, but also by the great, Lucille Watson.

Harry Davenport continued to appear in films up until his sudden death of a heart attack on August 9, 1949 at age eighty-three… one hour after he asked his agent Walter Herzbrun about a new film role! His last film was Frank Capra’s musical-comedy, RIDING HIGH (1950), which was released the year after his death. Bette Davis once called Davenport "without a doubt, the greatest character actor of all time.” Bette Davis!... can you imagine?!

Through his marriage to Phyllis, he was the brother-in-law of Lionel Barrymore who was married at the time to Phyllis' sister Doris. His entire family, including in-laws and eventually, all five of Harry Davenport’s own children would become actors or involved in production as well, as would a couple of his grandchildren. He was buried in Kensico Cemetery, Westchester County, New York. In the obituary, a newspaper called him the "white-haired character actor" with "the longest acting career in American history". Harry Davenport appeared in over 160 films. Asked why he made so many films at his age, he replied: “I hate to see men of my age sit down as if their lives were ended and accept a dole. An old man must show that he knows his job and is no loafer. If he can do that, they can take their pension money and buy daisies with it.”

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A Clip from SYBIL BRUNCHEON A LA MAISON (1986)... "Attempting Food"...

Directed by Victor Mignatti. Produced by Eric Perkins.

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Sybil Bruncheon's "Springtime… In Other… um… Places"...

Nancy Kuppermann so enjoyed the arrival of Spring! Like many housewives in her community, she did all her Spring cleaning; cleaned out the basement, attic, and garage, and even painted her husband’s study and a guest bedroom and bathroom… all before she started on the gardening. She and her best pal, Karen Folger, met on Saturday and picked out tulip, hyacinth, daffodil, and jralanthus bulbs, and, after an hour or so of planting together, they went grocery shopping. Brocklezezzer’s had a special in their Wonderful World of Salad Dressings section, and the girls didn’t want to miss out on both the variety and the bargains. So many wonderful flavors and regional specialties from all different parts of their world.

But that’s how it was in a place that was strictly vegetarian. Nancy had married a Chicory, and Karen’s husband was from a long line of Arugalas. Most women eventually ate their husbands around their second or third anniversary, and certainly no later than their 4th. They’d be too woody or even wilted by then… NO! A really sumptuous husband should be fresh, leafy green, rinsed thoroughly and served with a luscious blue cheese, or, in the case of Mr. Folger, a tangy Caesar! After all, he was really Italian, wasn’t he?… and that was how Springtime was celebrated on the planet JZzelelry 6… in the “Vega” system…

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Sybil Bruncheon’s History On This Date – February 5th, 1936…

Here HITLER is seen wearing the official Berlin Good Humor Man uniform and asking the nice ladies if they'd like to lick his "Poppen-Shtickle"...

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Sybil Bruncheon's KOOKY KAPTIONS!...

"Oh, Demetrius! Do you really think Woolite will be gentle enough? It's my favorite Blankie!"...

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