Ira Gallen's wonderful film of my old neighborhood on the Upper West Side in 1984...

The West 70s in and around Broadway before so-called “gentrification”, the 1%, landlords, and Rudolph Giuliani had completely decimated the charm, individuality, creativity, heritage, and uniqueness of the mom-and-pop, one-of-a-kind, and entrepreneurial shops, cafés, and specialty stores. Within a few years, the GAP, the banks, and the mega-corporations made the neighborhood just like every other one in NYC.

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

From Sybil Bruncheon’s “My Merry Memoirs”... a fracas at Harry Winston’s!

Harp Pendant George Sweet (1325).jpg

I ADORE multi-functional jewelry! Imagine! This beautiful little pendant is also a music box! You know, I once had a lovely bejeweled brooch in the shape of an organ grinder monkey, complete with his little red marching-band uniform and cap, and holding a tin cup. One day, the pin on the back came loose, and I took it to Harry Winston for repair. While I was sitting with one of their master-jewelers enjoying my café au lait and croissant at his work-table, he suddenly gave a shout! Did I know that my brooch was a Swiss-made music box from 1805-1810?...I said "no!"...and he pointed out that the works were stuck from all the years of wear and tear. He took out a Q-tip and some solvent and began working around on the back, poking and prodding, and we heard a tiny "ping!" and some gears whirring.

My jeweler friend smiled broadly and sat back very pleased with himself! He pressed the monkey's tail which was hinged!!... and out came a deafening clock-work FART!!!… YES!! DAMMIT! A FART!!.... Harry was sitting nearby and yowled in rage! He barred me from the store for 30 days as a punishment!! "For Upsetting The Sanctity & High Aesthetic Standards of The Harry Winston Establishment in The Marketplace"!!!! That was put on my record there… permanently...

And when I was finally readmitted as a client (a PAYING and HIGHLY EXTRAVAGANT client!) instead of being offered Veuve Clicquot champagne and caviar blintzes at the diamond bracelets counter, a plate of stale fig newtons and a box of old and chipped topaz “friendship rings” was tossed at me… in a broom closet!!! Me! Sybil Bruncheon! Can you imagine!! JEEESH!

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

Sybil Bruncheon’s “Who’z Dat?”… Birthdays on March 1st...!!!

Collage of March 1st (1202B).jpg

Birthdays on March 1st...!!! We all feel that tiny hint that Spring might just be in the air....even with last minute snowstorms still popping up to vex us. But March! The month of MARCH! Is it possible that we've survived another Winter??...and what a doozy this one was! So here are all the pretty faces of March 1st birthdays! All warm, and sexy, and succulent, and dewy-eyed, and reminding us of "Youth" or, well.. "Youth-ISH"...

(Top row left to right: Tim Daly, Roger Daltrey, Javier Bardem. Center: Justin Bieber. Bottom row left to right: Robert Conrad, Harry Belafonte, and Ron Howard)

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

Sybil Bruncheon’s GREAT MOMENTS IN THE ARTS!!... February 25th, 1918...

Nijinsky Swamp Cheerleader (1241G).jpg

On this date, February 25th, 1918, Vaslav Nijinsky staged his new ballet, “SIS KOOM-BAH!”… the heartbreaking story of a sensitive young man in college who decides against all sound advice to become a cheerleader for the Ladies’ Cross-Country & Obstacle-Course Croquet Team. Although teased and even assaulted mercilessly with oblong vegetables by a gang of traveling salesmen, he becomes the captain and inspires the other cheerleaders to win state competitions. Tragically, in the final act, the young man is struck by a fierce “dambuster shot” and he pitches into a swamp on the grounds of the Key Largo Secretarial Sciences Academy. Nijinsky reused his dying swan choreography to great effect as the drowning cheerleader…. tangled in a treacherous thicket of… um… wickets… The critics were rapturous!

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

Sybil Bruncheon’s GREAT MOMENTS IN THE ARTS!!... February 20th, 1918...

Nijinsky Spook Curtain (1241F).jpg

On this date, February 20th, 1918, Vaslav Nijinsky staged his new ballet, “THERE’S A SPOOK IN MY CURTAINS!”, the story of a sensitive young man who, having just gotten his driver’s license, backs his Model T over his grandmother and imagines her ghost has haunted his home. In the second act Nijinsky’s character loses his mind and tosses himself along with his dirty laundry into the newly invented washing machine for a pas de deux with a pair of flannel pajamas!…after a particularly terrifying spin cycle with the entire cast, the ballet ends with the young man in a final tableaux. He attaches drapery rings and hangs himself in a bay window… the audience fled the theatre screaming. Sadly, they were too frightened to stay and applaud… or ask for autographs.

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

From Sybil's "Treasure Chest"... Francesco Scavullo

151837493_3752715801484413_1615152133840744491_n.jpg

Many of you have asked me to dig through my attic and find photos, props, costumes, and other memorabilia, and tell you the stories that go with them, so...

Here we have a wonderful photo taken by the great Francesco Scavullo, who, in addition to being a major photographer for the entertainment world also provided every cover for Cosmopolitan magazine for over 30 years. His townhouse on East 63rd street was filled with portraits of every major music and film star and Presidents and their First Ladies.

When I first appeared in 1985 on the newly created GCN (Gay Cable Network) for Lou Maletta, one of my first viewers was Eric Perkins, Scavullo's studio manager who got Francesco and his partner Sean interested in my late-night shows. It was Eric who arranged for me to have an all-day shoot with Scavullo, and this was back in 1984, when a single portrait of his was priced at $10,000 (black and white!) and $12,000 for color! A SINGLE PORTRAIT!... and Francesco was booked non-stop!

Well, after one of the interns at GCN completely ignored the phone call from the Scavullo Studio approaching us for a photo session (he thought it was a crank-call from a jokester!), we finally scheduled the shoot. Hair and make-up were all arranged, and clothes and jewelry were provide by the major 5th Avenue fashion houses. I arrived at Francesco's beautiful townhouse there on the East side, and Eric and Sean had provided a lunch along with the services of their entire studio staff. We did one "look" after another, chatting and laughing, playing with accessories, fabulous jewelry and outfits, and having a marvelous afternoon. This was back when everything, EVERYTHING was on film! There were no "digital" cameras or formats; no looking at the finished photos on a monitor and making adjustments. The best you could do was to take a couple of polaroids, wait for them to develop, peel them and go from there! So... we finished. Everybody thanked everybody... and I waited.

About a week later, Eric called me to come in and see what we had done... It wasn't just that the photos were beautiful. They were "Scavullos"... like the portraits of Streisand, Julie Andrews, Liza Minelli, Sting (who had been there the day before!), and all the other mega-stars and icons of the time that hung on his walls. And, as if that wasn't enough, Francesco was giving me, as a gift(!), not one, but several of the photos, both black and whites, and even the color Hasselblad 2x2 slides... the originals! I was stunned! STUNNED!... and later when my head cleared and I was showing several friends over dinner that night, we realized that Francesco had given me over a quarter of a million dollars worth of his talent. I can never thank Eric enough for beginning the whole adventure. And my gratitude to Francesco, Sean, and their staff is eternal.

And frankly, after all these years, it would be much cheaper to have the plastic surgery necessary to make me look like those portraits again, than to have new ones taken by Francesco, even if we COULD bring him back from the Heaven where I'm sure he's installed as Head Portraitist... to the Angels!

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

Sybil Bruncheon's "Children's Stories for Adults... and Vice Versa!"... The Hunted!

148181356_3730410943714899_5412278417210805602_n.jpg

... and so, even though he had had a couple of close calls in which he had narrowly escaped, the lawsuits descended on him in packs, literally nipping at his heels and those of his family as they scrambled to escape through the mounting challenges. Their options and opportunities vanished or even became impediments as more and more adversaries chased and chased... nipping, biting, and literally bleeding them dry. One by one, his former friends, fellow conspirators, and even his own skank-litter fell, exhausted and humiliated, and were torn to pieces. Torn to pieces... and ruined... all ruined...

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

Sybil Bruncheon’s GREAT MOMENTS IN THE ARTS!!... February 17th, 1918...

Nijinsky Looks Fat (1241E).jpg

Sybil Bruncheon’s GREAT MOMENTS IN THE ARTS!!... On this date, February 17th, 1918, Vaslav Nijinsky staged his new ballet, “DO MY LEOTARDS MAKE ME LOOK FAT?”, the story of a sensitive young coal-miner in West Virginia who struggles daily between the challenges of “black-lung” and bulimia. His pas-de-deux in the second act was particularly poignant as he danced with his caged canary, dressed in nothing but a head-lamp!

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

Sybil Bruncheon's "My Merry Memoirs"... chapter 82, page 402...

Sybil Lobster Freak Show Carnival (1129A).jpg

Some of you have noticed in my Tour-ettes when I'm cooking that I have on special oven mitts; strangely shaped and... uh... a little oversized. Sadly, Mummie was born with... um... a slight... "anomaly". Why do you think she spent so many years in the county fair circuit in tents marked "The Incredible Lobster Lady"? I was hired to pinch oblong vegetables in half for delighted audiences, every half-hour for 18 shows a day, including question-and-answer and autograph/photo sessions, in a coconut brassiere and grass skirt. Eventually though, the novelty wore off and people were no longe willing to pay 25 cents to see my "talent". I had to escalate the gimmick to pinching ten-penny nails, kindling wood, and finally teen-age girls' diaries, local telephone books, and railroad spikes. It was exhausting, and, in the end, surgery was required to rebuild my hands. I still have some scars if one wants to look closely!... and you wonder why I often wear stylish gloves for my show-lettes!

Tour-ette: https://youtu.be/lRm6XJouoeI

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]

Sybil Bruncheon’s GREAT MOMENTS IN THE ARTS!!... February 6th, 1918...

Nijinsky Missed Bus (1241D).jpg

Sybil Bruncheon’s GREAT MOMENTS IN THE ARTS!!... On this date, February 6th, 1918, Vaslav Nijinsky staged his new ballet, “OH CRAP! I MISSED THE BUS!”, the story of a sensitive youth in an urban metropolis who pits his romantic notions against those of a cold and callous modern world. Act 1 takes place in a slum barber shop, a crime ridden billiard hall, and finally in a back-alley where the young man tries to purchase a corsage. Nijinsky later created a sequel to this ballet called “TAXI!, OH, TAXI!”…

[Want to read other fun and funny stories here on SybilSez.com? Just enter any topic that pops into your head in the "search" window on the upper right! Who knows what might come up?...and feel free to share them with your friends!]