Sybil Bruncheon’s “A DEBBIE DOWNER ALERT”... even at Holiday Time!
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Do you have a Debbie Downer on your Facebook page? I do.. Even at Holiday Time!!!! They just look at your photos but don’t read the story and then make stupid or redundant statements! Or they “help” rewrite your story in their comments never having written a story themselves; they snark about this or that on YOUR posts but never offer anything of interest on their own pages; tell you how wrinkled, old, fat, or ugly you are while looking like Jabba The Hutt themselves; …Oh, the list goes on and on! And so, in the spirit of Holiday merry-making and cheer, I’m posting some of my very favorite comments that I’ve gotten THIS past year! Sadly, there’s only room for ten, but OH how I could fill the room! If nothing else, Debbie Downer is prolific!….
-1) "Sybil, dear, technically nutmeg is also a fruit and should never be given to children because of its hallucinogenic qualities. You're thoughtless... and should be arrested!"
- 2) "Have you ever considered what would have happened had Tiny Tim been a Buddhist and believed in his own reincarnation?"
- 3) "Some readers may not realize that you're making a joke about plum pudding because they have been injured in a fiery dessert catastrophe. I don't think being burned by a pudding is funny. I feel sorry for you."
- 4) "That is Alistair Sim as Scrooge... but I like Reginald Owen... or is it Reginald Gardner?.... or is it Reginald Marsh?"...
- 5) "I have an allergy to cranberries and popcorn but I CAN eat the string. I like eating string, thread, and angel hair spaghetti. Heck, I like eating hair, period!"
- 6) "Isn't it funny? Holly is very poisonous! So is mistletoe! Very Poisonous! And poinsettias are very poisonous....technically, everything about Christmas is very poisonous. That's why I hate Santa Claus! And I told him so at Macy's...right before I slugged him."
- 7) "I got coal in my stocking one year, and I heated my washing machine box in the alley for a week. I was warm... but I had to eat my cat... and my box finally caught fire."
- 8) "Why a miracle on 34th Street....and which one too? East 34th or West 34th? I waited for three hours on East 34th and 2nd Avenue, and nothing happened....until a bus splashed me with mud."....
- 9) "I almost hit a reindeer once....but I was on my sled and it ran away. I was scared and cried and cried.... I was 37 at the time."
- 10) "Sybil...I do a one-woman show of the nativity scene and I play all the parts, including the shepherds, the stable owner and his wife, the three wise men and Mary, Joseph, and the blesséd Christ-child. My favorite part though is getting on all fours and making animal sounds and pretending I live in a barn! Oh, and for that part, I take off all my clothes.”… Yup!
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