Sybil Bruncheon's "People In Poetry!"... A Wedding Day...

Mimsy knelt at her sister’s feet, so proud and glad, you see.

For Myra was to be a bride, and married off to Lee.

“The eldest daughter leads the way”, their Mother sagely said.

“No other girl may marry till the oldest girl has wed.”

 

While Mimsy knelt, dear Flora Sue kissed Myra on the cheek.

Not yet her chance to run away, a honeymoon to seek.

She had her eyes on Carlton Drubb, an up and coming Clerk,

Whose Father owned a notions shop and forced him there to work.

 

And Stacy Sue, there on the right, tried on her sister’s veil.

The youngest of the Fernley girls, her fancies didn’t fail.

She dreamt of Princes, Shahs, and Kings, or maybe just a duke.

She’d even settle for a judge wearing a high peruke.

 

But Mimsy, Flora, ‘n’ Stacy Sue, just didn’t seem to note

That Myra sat in her bridal gown, her thoughts all so remote.

Her feverish brain was filled with fears and riddled through with dread.

A week of nightly terrors that concerned her marriage bed.

 

To tell the truth, our Bride-to-be had never played the bride

In childhood games with other girls, she even sometimes cried!

And kissing boys behind the barn had nearly made her sick.

Their rough and stupid manners, their intellects so thick!

 

Now here she was, a grown-up girl, compelled to play the game.

The game that every woman knows or else to live in shame.

Be a wife, and be polite. Eventually bear a child.

And cook and clean and bake a cake… Or always be reviled.

 

So Myra stared now straight ahead, to a dreary, weary life.

Of baby showers and diaper dirt as Lee’s so pretty wife.

But walking in right through the door was her school chum Clara-Ann!

Their eyes did meet, they shared a kiss, and off the two girls ran!

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Sybil Bruncheon's "Thanksgiving Household Hints & Helpfuls!"...

Christmas WIFE (also Thanksgiving) (1063).jpg

Facebook Friends!… Making plans for your Thanksgiving?? Why not get in touch with the Institute of Advanced Thankfulness & Attendant Festivities? They have a staff of internationally recognized experts who have lifted the traditional "turkey 'n' stuffing" we all grew up with into a science. And by applying protocols of research, experimentation, and advanced study they have made breakthroughs that may eliminate all the trial and error of improvised side dishes, improperly prepared recipes from Grandma, dried out or fossilized turkey carcasses, bizarre Jello concoctions, and timing catastrophes between arrivals of appetizers and apple pies. They can even provide the modern housewife with special garments which aid in the whole process and protect her from injury while giving her every kitchen utensil she could possibly need. Why not get in touch with our staff today? Just call I-M-N-O-T-U-R-K-E-Y... that's right! Dial 466-688-7539. The nice man will tell you how to order!… and wait! This just in! If you order now, you’ll receive the new miniature carry-all purse-sized version of these handy dandy items… invented by our own Dr. Heidi Klieber, it’s the new “Swiss Army Wife”!… Perfect for Picnics, Parties, or the Battle-Front! It can perform over 76 different “wifely-functions”!… even after “lights-out”!... Call today!

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Sybil Bruncheon's "Springtime Weddings from Here & There!”... Prayerful Corners, WY.

DATELINE! ....Prayerful Corners, Wyoming..... The On-Your-Knees Sepulchre & Souvenir Emporium is celebrating the once-a-year festival of Smile Day when brides-to-be, high school graduates, and Spelling Bee Finalists are allowed to wear colored clothing, prints, and even fabrics other than burlap. The mayor of Prayerful Corners cut the ribbon for the 24 hour parade and party on the traditional third Thursday in July, when the normally somber citizens toss their black and grey garments to the floor and take their first baths of the year! Then it's every man, woman, and child for themselves! Many have saved up loose change and found pennies to buy fabric, Elmer's glue, and office staplers to put together any shreds of whimsy they can manage in the short time they have. It's a mad dash to weddings, award ceremonies, pie eating contests, piñata breaking, three-legged races, and karaoke barbecues! Because by midnight on Friday everything must be tossed into the giant Bonfire Of Stinky Sinfulness in the town square, and the holy vows of glad-to-be-gloominess begin again. Yes! Laugh it up ladies!.... in a few hours it's back on your knees, and NOT to catch a crepe paper bridal bouquet!

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