….."Hello, my dear subjects! At this festive time of year, I am pleased to be speaking to you at my first Christmas as your Queen. Just last night, I was brought to a lovely re-enactment of the Nativity at a charming church in Havelock-on-Bunbury. At the end of the little play-lette, I walked up to the stage, and remember so well both the sweetness of that little baby and my SHOCK when I realized that it was being raised in a stable!!..A STABLE!...Can you imagine?! And in a MANGER!!!... with grass clippings!....and I SAID SO to his parents!!!!!!....And WHY are there FARM animals milling about in here?? They are not hygienic!!!... all this milling and lowing!!!!...at least have the sense to have EXOTIC animals around the child to stimulate his imagination!! Peacocks, and leopards, and..and....um...oh! A Gryphon!....and, oh what was that animal I shot in Kenya, Phillip??? Oh Yes!!!! A HYRAX!!!!... or was it an Ibex?....whatever! And what is that incessant DRUMMING?!?... have one of my ladies escort that dirty little boy OUT at once….."
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